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Permeability: Meeting others on common ground

We’re on a journey of understanding our relationship to time, and how we respond to it. Last month I

talked about Complexity, the second in my Five-Part series.



This month let’s look at what happens when you move from Complexity into Permeability — which is when you’re awash in the ideas of others, the world around you, and demands being made on you. You’re so saturated with what’s happening around you become detached from your core, your Self, your own sense of wellbeing.


And once you get on that cycle, unable to recognize what’s happening, you can spiral down quite quickly. You don’t feel confident to make a decision.


Confidence isn’t something you acquire or make yourself do. It’s the result of a keen knowing of Self,

grace with limiting factors, and setting strong boundaries. Too many projects, attending to the needs of everyone else, reading every Social Media meme about how to look at the world, and what you need to do to be better, all contribute to your feeling confused and defeated.


Here are a few ways I work with my clients so they are able to reduce their sensitivity to feelings of

confusion and overwhelm:

  • Re-name confusion and call it options. Confusion keeps you stuck and helpless, while options just mean there is more than one way to see things.

  • Relax and let your Self see that it is the situation you’re looking at, and not YOU that is unclear.

  • Notice where and when your sense of self returns when you reframe confusion to noticing your options. Now, bring on your decision-making power by asking yourself some questions to help you discern what is most important to you now

  • Looking at the options before you which serve what needs and what will be the results should you bring them on? What will you achieve if you bundle them? Which ones can be set aside, and which are you ready to release? What boundaries will you set in order to implement them?

Answering even some of these questions will begin to set you free from the information tsunami coming toward you at all times.


Something marvelous will start to happen—you feel more grounded and able to tackle what’s in front of you. You feel your sense of Self again—more sure of your direction. You’re inhabiting your confidence.

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